Bad End Part 6 - Never let the pain stop

[goldenglasses]

CW: Noncon, dubcon, gaslighting, violence, imprisonment, confinement, bondage, sex toys, humiliation, body modifications, forced feminization, child death, sex slavery, forced pregnancy, degradation, miscarriages, mental manipulation, drug use, overdose, restraints, violence, torture, monster fucking, and everything awful. I feel I'm forgetting some warning so please be careful if you're reading this as we are going to go very dark.

Things only continue to get worse. Vash continues to spiral and loose himself the more the mind breaking continues. The mages continue to use Cyril like he's nothing but a toy to use and throw away. Yet, any chance they have to have together the love Vash and Cyril share together stays strong. For now that remains unbroken. With every day only getting worse that will continue to be challenged.

Cyril tries to look Vash in the eye. He may be disappointed by the way Vash's eyes drift to the side towards Cyril's shoulder. He tries to do it slowly and not draw attention to it, but as he's looking for it, it will be easy for Cyril to spot.



[name reference:
Chasind Warrior - Enid
Pack Leader - Roderic
Pack Warrior - Hyde
Pack Rogue - Alpin
Right bastard - Shira
Mage Male - Durand
Mage Female - Duclea
Creepy 'Doctor' - Nikolai
French Lady - Elyna
Mage - Arabelle
Mage - Eirk

Elf slave leader: Taenya
Taenya's son: Marikoth
Half-elves: Kythaela and Lierin
Cyril's replacement name: Lyra
Human Slave: Sarah
Master's Friend: Rupert
Two slave boys: Poppet and Honey
Cyril and Marikoth's child: Cassandra
Cyril and Vash's kids: Alex and Soren

The mages
Vash's master: Titus
One into elves: Claudius
Third mage: Aelius
Poppet and Honey's creator: Appius

red lyrium]
 

Comments

[goldenglasses]

"Yeah. I don't either." Except... a part of him did. He wants to remember when his kids were small. He wants to remember that feeling of relief when all three of them survived their creation.

He doesn't share this thought with Cyril as he moves to lay down beside him. For a few minutes he lay silently and stares up at the clouds.

Do you have one of those, Vash? His brother's words from last night echo in his mind.

"I love you, Cyril."

[samahl]

Cyril winces as Vash says that. "I know," he says softly. He closes his eyes and takes a breath. "I love you too."

[goldenglasses]

Why did he wince?

Vash wants to reach out and hold Cyril's hand, but he resists the temptation. Maybe it will be for the best if Cyril is falling out of love with him.

His life would have been better if he had done so years ago after all.

He doesn't say anything else. Falling silent until he gets up a couple minutes later to play with the kids.

[samahl]

Cyril remains quiet too. Eventually, Vash gets up to play with the boys, and Cyril stays where he is. He ends up dozing a little to the sounds of Vash playing with the boys.

[goldenglasses]

Vash lets Cyril rest and distracts the boys. Although, as the boys start to get tired, Vash gets an idea. He tries to get them settle close to their dozing father. Hoping that maybe their calm presence will help Cyril sleep.

[samahl]

Cyril opens his eyes when he feels the boys get closer. He smiles at them and shifts so they can relax near him. He doesn't really seem like he'll sleep now, but he doesn't mind cuddling with the boys.

[goldenglasses]

"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you. I just thought... maybe they'd help keep the nightmares away." Now that he can't do it anymore.

[samahl]

"Hm. It's alright," he says softly. "I don't mind spending time with my boys." He offers Vash a reassuring smile as he lets the boys settle next to him.

[goldenglasses]

"I know, but I'm sure you could use some sleep as well."

[samahl]

Cyril hums in response, a noncommittal sound. He just stays quiet as the boys fall asleep.

[goldenglasses]

Vash also falls silent. He sits next to his family and is happy to stare off into nothing and listen to the birds and life around them. It's nice to just have a moment of peace together.

Eventually he starts to hum softly. Rem's favorite tune.

[samahl]

Cyril stays like that for a while, listening to Vash hum and the boys sleep. Then, after a moment, "How are you feeling?" he asks finally. "Better?"

[goldenglasses]

Cyril may be confused by the flash of panic Vash feels at the question before he clamps it down. "Yeah. I think I've been doing better."

Liar.

[samahl]

Cyril frowns. He leans up, resting against his arms. "That's not true," he says. "What happened?"

[goldenglasses]

"It's alright. You don't need to worry. I won't let myself get as bad as the other night again."

[samahl]

Cyril frowns. "How are you fixing it? Are you coping with what you did?"

[goldenglasses]

"Yeah." No. He's been too distracted by everything else to work on coping much. "It's alright. You don't need to worry about me." There's a brief pause. "Knives is there to help me. You just need to focus on yourself now."

[samahl]

Cyril sighs. "I don't know how much help Knives will be. He doesn't care that you took a life."

[goldenglasses]

It's not what Vash meant, but Vash is also happy to let Cyril think the wrong thing. "It doesn't matter. It's enough so you don't need to worry."

[samahl]

Cyril's eyes narrow. "No. I think I will worry about it, Vash. You had a break down over something that happened that long ago. I need to know if you're doing better or if you're still hurting."

[goldenglasses]

"I'm doing better. It's fine. It won't happen again." It at least won't happen again where Cyril will be disturbed and have to take care of him.

[samahl]

"Well... what does that mean?" Cyril seems a little like he's starting to get annoyed. He's been so careful to hide his emotions from Vash since that day in the river, but now a little bit of it is starting to leak through.

[goldenglasses]

"It means I won't let myself get that bad again." He looks towards the kids. "I'll let things go before it stops me from being able to take care of the kids. So you don't need to worry about me anymore." He doesn't matter. Only the kids matter.

[samahl]

Cyril looks at Vash for a long, quiet moment. He sighs and lies back down. "Fine," he says.

[goldenglasses]

The desire to vanish from Cyril's life is rising again. If he wasn't absolutely sure Knives would keep the kids from Cyril he would have.

Here he was. Ruining their nice picnic again when all he wanted was to try and put Cyril's mind at ease. Instead he's done the opposite.

"I'm trying, Cyril. I'm am. I'm sorry, I don't mean to upset you." It's all he seems capable of doing these days.